I've been embracing my adopted city of Chicago by reading a collection of Chicago Tribune legend Mike Royko's writing — namely, Sez Who? Sez Me. I haven't read Royko since I was a mere tyke (or at least a small dweeb) who was too young to fully grasp the awesomeness of Royko's hilarious, sharp, wide-ranging columns. They hold up great, and one piece on the end of the Vietnam war could pretty much be reprinted verbatim right now, at the (sorta) end of the Iraq war.  Continue reading...

While reading the Aug. 19 Rolling Stone and trying to wrap my brain around Matt Taibbi's latest piece on our country's ongoing financial shenanigans, I stumbled onto an article on Katy Perry, who I know very little about due to my old age.  Continue reading...

I can only imagine how annoying the words Twitter and tweet are to people who haven't gotten in on the microblogging phenomenon. It's been over a year since I embraced all things tweet-y, and I like it so much that I continue praying to Zeus daily that Twitter never goes the way of Friendster and the pet rock. (Public service announcement: Neuter your pet rock. You can never be too careful.)  Continue reading...

USA! USA! USA!

Sorry for the chanting and the giant foam finger. I just wanted to establish that this is a thoroughly all-American column and provide a smooth transition to a term that brings together two of my top two interests: euphemisms and dogs.  Continue reading...

The NBA playoffs have long been the highlight of my television year, and like so many other boob tube productions, they produce their share of euphemisms.  Continue reading...

Sometimes a euphemism is staring you in the face, blowing a raspberry, and insulting your mother, but you don't even realize it. That's how I feel about mischief — a word whose history I might be doomed to repeat, since I didn't know diddly about it till recently.  Continue reading...

As the most ravenous euphemism-hunter in North America, I sometimes have to act quickly and without mercy. Euphemisms are cunning — always hiding under rocks, burrowing themselves in dictionaries that fell into ravines, or appearing on wavelengths blocked by the tin-foil hat that nice man from Mars helped me assemble into a Helmet of Awesomeness and Security.  Continue reading...