contributorMark Peters
Mark Peters is a language columnist, lexicographer, and humorist who has written for Esquire, The Funny Times, New Scientist, Psychology Today, Salon, and Slate. He contributes to OUPblog and writes the Best Joke Ever column for McSweeney's. You can read Mark's own jokes on Twitter, such as, "I play by my own rules, which is probably why no one comes to my board game parties anymore."Evasive ManeuversEuphemisms old and newWhich Came First: The Chicken or the Hen Apple?  May 8, 2020
Even in horrible times, you can always count on euphemisms. Evasive language never takes a day off.
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Article Topics:Evasive ManeuversEuphemisms old and newFiercely Real Humanism and Other Hooey in the Physical Distancing Age April 8, 2020
Are you physical distancing or social distancing? Either way, there's a euphemism to distract you during these unprecedented times.
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Evasive ManeuversEuphemisms old and newLess-Transparent, Potentially Recyclable Candidates for the Bin Pod March 16, 2020
Are you having a rebuilding year? Whether you're building, rebuilding, reloading, unloading, or just slowly turning to dust, euphemisms are a proven distraction from the perils of your own life.
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Article Topics:Dog EaredBooks we loveDennis Baron's "What's Your Prounoun? Beyond He & She" is a Timely Winner February 27, 2020 By Mark Peters
Thanks to the prominence of pronouns and the depth of Baron's work, a Tour of the History of Nonbinary Pronouns is probably going to be the language book of the year.
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Rejoice! There's a new candidate for Euphemism of the Year, Drivel of the Decade, and Malarkey of the Millennium.
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Article Topics:Evasive ManeuversEuphemisms old and newFinding (or Inventing) Euphemisms in the Latest OED Update November 13, 2019 By Mark Peters
Here's a look at the OED's latest quarterly update to see if there are any euphemisms. If not, I'll suggest how some of the terms could be euphemisms. After all, this column is an offering to the Malarkey Gods.
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Article Topics:Evasive ManeuversEuphemisms old and newUnidentified Aerial Horse Apples October 9, 2019 By Mark Peters
Whether the aliens who will someday destroy humanity are first labeled UFOs, UAPs, or OH CRAPs, the human race continues to produce euphemisms faster than a bug-eyed space monster gets pink eye. So wrap your eyeballs around these horse dumplings while you can.
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